What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

what's the difference between a duck?

Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

Why did the Nazi doctor drown a Jew in the lake? Because he felt like it.

Yo mama's so fat that she pushed you off your computer and you couldnt write anymore "yo Mama" jokes.

What stops a train? A missile

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

Whats pink and slippery? A pink slipper.

Why is the chicken on the road? Cuz he died trying to get to the other side.

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

This sentence is not humorous in any fashion whatsoever.

jack and jill climbed up the hill but they were bagels

Why did michael jackson wear white gloves around young boys? His doctor recommended that he do so due to bad circulation.

What do a black man and an elephant have in common? They are both multi-cellular organisms, they both belong to the kingdom Animalia, the phylum Chordata, and the class Mammalia, they both possess vertebrae, they both move through legged locomotion, they both possess knee joints and they both possess the capacity for altruistic behavior.

What do you call a black man and an Asian at a school? Two hard-working, dedicated teachers.

Your mom is so fat, every time she swims in the ocean, north america sinks because of the high water displacement caused by her giant body mass. (V1-V2=m)

What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

Your dick is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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