A Jew and a Nazi walk into a bar... 1 year later they are married with a baby on the way

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

A girl accidentally clicks on an advertisement while on anti-jokes.com, the girl silently curses and quickly presses the back button.

a man walk into a bakery, he sais... may i have a loaf of bread....

like if u think princess kenny is the fairest maiden in all the land. if u dont, disregard this message.

- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

sean punches bryce in the face, sean then says ow you just punched me in the face. that hurt

why was the movie rated PG 13? mild violence and sexual content

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Chicken.

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Why did Osama bin Laden cross the road? To get shot in the face.

"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

What is the difference between a duck? A motorcycle because vests don't have sleeves.

justin beiber has a penis hahahahahahhaah lol not really

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it did not realize it was a man-made distinction for constructed transportation vehicles and had a coincidental tendency to walk toward the area on the other side to find food or avoid birds flying over.

sky's sty

Why is John single? Because women are materialistic.

How do you kill a turtle? You can't, it has a shell for a reason.

Every human being has some kind of penis <3

I remember my days you know in the army, agfanifuckingstan, got dirty water, then spent a week shitting... Anyway, I was holding a grenade right? And then two of them came around and I was like "here come good boy! GOOOD BOY! Catch the ball!" And then I pulled the pin and threw it. Aww shut up, you are all like "YOU SOLDIER KILL PUPPIES!" NO THOSE WHERE KIDS! And they would have been like 15 today and been killing your men today! YOU ARE SO FUCKING WELCOME!

Q. How did the blind man savvier from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died.

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...