Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

Why was Helen Keller such a bad driver? Cause she was blind, def, and mute. Thus making it difficult to drive.

are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Finding two worms. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Dying from cancer.

How can you tell if your wife is dead? The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

What's black, white and red and can't turn round in corridors? A nun with a spear through her head

What do you call 47 black people dead at the bottom of the ocean? A terrible hate crime

What did the little calculator grow up to be? Nothing

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

Did you hear about the guy who did a backflip off the cliff? He died

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the road because apparently their was something on the other side that appealed to the chicken. It was probably your mom.

17

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken

What do a dog and a fork have in common? They both have tails. Except for the fork.

An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

Why couldn't the fireman get over the hill? Because he was dead.

What happened to the seal that walked into the zoo? Well nothing because seals can't walk.

Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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