How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? However many needed.

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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Q. Why is the road black? A. One hundred million dollars!

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if you press the thumbs up button nyan cat is going to visit you tonight

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why was the man sad? his wife died

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Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

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Q. Where's your nan???? A. In my closet

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roses are red violets are blue that's just the way god made them

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Q: How do you scream at a purple? A: Black people

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Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

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why didn't the girl show up for school? because she was dead

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What do a blonde and a door knob have in common? Everybody gets a turn

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Q: What do you get when you cross an alcoholic and a sex addict? A: A baby

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Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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69

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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the world is made out of 4 things. protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons

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I wont say I got much money, but neither do I need it, just be honest to me, because if you lie, every advice I give you, could cost you or me everything, our lives, our families... Collateral damage is a term used very often and lightly ever since 9/11

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What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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Person 1: Why does food from Subway taste so good? Person 2: I don't know, why? Person 1: Because their ingredients are fresh. Person 2: Um, OK? Person 1: Yeah, it's all under 18. Person 2: Shit...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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