Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

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Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

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Cornelius went to the dcotor and got a sticker and a lollipop for being a good patient. He later went home and shoved the lollipop stick up his dick hole and started wildly masturbating. I forgot to mention Cornelius was 42 years old.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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As a kid I was always told that school would get me good places. As an adult, I have found that there is another thing that gets you into a good place. Shrooms.

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Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M's factory? For throwing away all the W's

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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How do you pacify Hitler? Give him jews.

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A British man walks into a bar. He has to get stitches.

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Jack and jill went up a hill to get some water. Jack fell down, twisted his ankle, and continued to roll. He broke his spine and collar bone and he was later taken to the hospital. Later that night he died because the doctors couldn't do anything. Jill then killed herself in mourning.

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Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

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What do you call mexicans running down the hallway? JAIL BREAK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: Why did the Jew fit in with the White people? A: Because he, and his compatriots, have accepted the view of Judaism as a religion, and perhaps a lifestyle -- but not a race.

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What is the difference between a pumpkin and a dead baby? There are thousands of differences between a dead human and the fruit of a pumpkin plant. One of them is that I didn't choke my wife to death with a pumpkin. Another is that pumpkins have a stem.

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Why couldn't the duck fly? It died.

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Where did the banana go? -Nowhere, a banana can't walk.,

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Dear crush, I want to drink you

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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