Ask me if im an Airplane. Are your Airplane? Hell yes

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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why did suzy fall off the swing? she has no arms, knock knock who's there? Not suzy!

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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why did the irishman, the englishman and the african man die? because i went on a violent killing spree, murdering everyone i saw

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

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"Have you got any Saturday jobs available?" "Yes"

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Whats the difference between a lemon and an ant? They're both yellow except for the lemon.

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Your mom's so fat, I tried to rape her but couldn't find her p**** and gave up. Instead I decided to take her out to dinner. We enjoyed a lovely meal and I spent the rest of the night trimming her fat with a vegetable peeler while she screamed and bled all over the floor.

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Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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Why did Timmy start a fire? Because Timmy was a derranged phycopath

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Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

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There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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What doesn't kill you and doesn't make you stronger? Aids

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Two People go To Africa They have a lovely time they come home then go to Miami Florida after Florida they decide to go to germany sadly there was a plane crash and the two men fell into a pit of acid.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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A blind man and his dog walk into a store, the man lifts up the dog and begins to spin around. When questioned about his activity the man replies, "I'm just looking around"

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Anybody else hate when people mispell words in jokes It ruins the joke Most them prob some scumbags Probs to Jeffrey K April 12, 2013 1:55 PM

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've tested positive for herpes We probably shouldn't have intercourse

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops