Knock, knock. After a couple minutes of waiting the man knows that no one is home and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What’s worse than being ruled by Adolf Hitler? Being ruled by Joseph Stalin.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did a fireman say to his wife right after they got ran over by a stampede of bulls? nothing.... they were dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How did the blonde reply to the male man when he asked how she was? "I'm good."

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What do you call a clock that has no sense of time? .....Broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Cinema greatest shit final, anime and videogames dont translate well into movies edition: One day... a young man named Tyler Reed, is chased by the notorious bully named Peter Ganondorf... Just then... he coincidentally utters "I AM THE LINK!" And a great lightning bolt strikes him... Tyler Becomes THE LINK! As for Peter Ganondorf... he became a pile of burning ashes... But Just then THE LINK, gets contacted by Jessica Fairy! And receives a important message... The evil Dr.Bullshitious has destroyed the connection without earth and planet Zelda! And that is bad... BECAUSE! Can Tyler Reed use his powers of lightning fast flight, and collect the TWO pieces of the mystic "triforce" to earn the ultimate weapon? The Master gun! Most importantly, can he become THE LINK between Planet Zelda and Earth? *Shows random shots that you cant make shit of like those movies you know suck just from the narration* ZELDA: THE LINK TO PLANET EVOLUTION! Moral: Still better than Dragon Ball Evolution...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the man get a divorce? Because his wife had an affair.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the black man get arrested? Because he was in possession of powder cocaine, which is a schedule I narcotic in the United States. This incident probably would not have happened if an end was put to the war on drugs, which is notorious for disproportionately targeting blacks and other minority groups, even though whites are statistically more likely to use such substances.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

ask if someone wants to hear a joke then say "never mind"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Reading the Terms and Conditions

thumb_up thumb_down -19

sfdg

thumb_up thumb_down -19

jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

thumb_up thumb_down -19

tims sty:)

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

thumb_up thumb_down -19

your mother is so fat that she got brain damaged from cardiac arrest and now needs medical care for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops