what has 2 legs and bleeds alot half a dog

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A cat walks into a bar. What's the first thing it says? Absolutely nothing. It was knocked out.

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Q: What's full of different butts and smells bad? A: An ashtray.

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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two scientists walk into a bar. one says, "i want h2o." the other says, "i want h2o too." the bartender gives them both water and nobody dies because he is not irresponsible enough to give someone concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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Whoever just posted that suicide shit is stupid, you can get arrested for that shit. I would delete it.

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The audience was ready, the stage was set, as soon as the show ended, the actors applauded towards the audience shouting ENCORE! The audience paid and went home, then they suddenly went... HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS SCENARIO!? They cared so much about one another, that they wanted to fall in love with each other. Now that is true love that is not love people! Nerometal (Ironically my name is Nero, I bet the Neronism guys name is Dwayne Maskdork or something, seriously...)

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What happens when you give a Jew an iPhone? He says thank you and gives you a hug.

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Penis-biter

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what do get when you throw a penny in between a jew and a mexican? nothing besides one less penny

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What did the father say to his son? I'm leaving and I'm not actually your father.

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So, I'm sitting by this guy in Science class and we're learning about fungi. So this guy is being really nice and I tell him, "Bro, you're just a FUNgi to hang around", like fun guy.

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weston cage

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Why couldnt the car move? It got blown up by a tank.

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What happens when a black man is alone the KKK appears

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What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

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what does chicken and triceratops have in common both their jokes are anti-climatic, from lack of punchline

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What did the Asian store clerk say to the midget? yay penis

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How do you make a car? You build it.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

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What smells like satans pubic hair and dresses like a woman? Vinny Trolia

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how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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