whats red and smells like blue paint? blue paint on the rag

What do you call a fish with 6 legs? A fish with 6 legs.

roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

A black man is sitting in front of the bus Then he respectfully gives up his seat to an elder woman

Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

HITLER IS SO SEXY I WOULD PAY A MILLION DOLLARS TO HAVE SEX WITH HIS DEAD HOT BODY WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT HIM I SPRAY MY SEMEN ALL OVER MY JEWISH SLAVES YUMMY HITLER JUST MAKES ME WANT TO BITE HIS ROTTING PENIS OFF AND FORCE IT IN THE EYE SOCKET OF A JEWISH PERSON AND THEN I CUM IN HIS EYESOCKET

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why do elephants have such big ears? So they can hear really well.

Can everyone please stop posting shit about my girlfriend because it seriously isnt cool.

Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

Q: What did the priest say to the small child. A: Rite?

What did the cop say to the people watching the house fire? All right nothing to see here jokes over

Yo momma is so fat, that when I went over to your house and accidentally stepped on a skateboard, yo momma came out and said "get the %$^# off the skateboard!"

Friends are like potatoes, when you eat them, they die.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 6's family

A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

Did you hear about the man who lost his whole left side of his body? He has been taken to hospital and is in a critical state where his right side of his body can not be joined together. This is life threatning and he is now not able to walk

Did you hear about the Englishman who ran all the way to Loch Ness? Oh, that's a shame, because I didn't either.

Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

Shaniqua: Knock knock Random black guy: Who is there? Shaniqua: It's me your girlfriend I had a really nice meeting with my dick Random black guy:What?

An Englishman, an Irishman, a Frenchman, a Scottish man, an Australian, a German, a Spaniard, an Icelandic man, a Norwegian, a Swede, a Dane, an Italian, a Morrocan, an American, an Algerian, an Egyptian, a Syrian, an Israelite, a Chinese man, a Russian, a Japanese man, an Indian and a Brazilian all walk into a bar. It was a large bar.

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

What's better than fornicating two 4 year old twins? Killing their parents in front of them before you do.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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