how do you know when your in love? massive erection.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

billy has 100 candy bars he eats 78 of them what does he have now diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How did the girl get rid of a fever? She took medicine.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what's purple and tastes like a grape? a grape.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than waking up with a hangover? Not waking up at all

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How does he keep getting girls to sleep with him? Bear-traps..

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

i like having monkeys lick peanut butter off my nipples

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Back in my day,we used to have Johnny Cash,Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have higher divorce rates.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the kid have a toy truck? because he bought it

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the boy drop his ice cream He was hit by a bus and he wasn't eating ice cream

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the girl go to the hospital? She had an asthma attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did josh pick up the quarter because he's a jew

thumb_up thumb_down +15

guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Fifteen out of twenty therapists is great, but five are left out.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops