What's big,long,and mostly men use it? A submarine

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why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC for his job interview

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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whats the difference between Obama and Romney answer: one would have been a good president instead of a communist

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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You are in a sealed room with Joseph Stalin, Osama bin Laden, and Hitler and have a revolver with two bullets. Who do you shoot? None of them. You awkwardly set the gun down and wonder how to get out of this room filled with three corpses.

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"Knock knock," said the guy about to deliver a knock knock joke.

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Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

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you know what's worse than being grounded? AIDS

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roses are red violets are blue some poems make sense banana monkey glue

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What's black and is as fast as a car? A black car.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute goes by.

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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