Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

SNAPPLE!

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

A Jew and a Nazi have dinner together...... they both immensely enjoyed the wine.

A man walks into a bar. He says, "Ow, that really hurt."

A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

What do you call a with no arms and no legs floating in the water? About to drown.

whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What did the japonese man say? Nothing that we can understand.

The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

Q:I finished my Homework A:thats what she said

your mommy so gehto shes black

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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