What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

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im gay because im gay

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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170

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Sarah Palin

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I told a woman to make me at turkey sandwich. Of course she complied seeing as I was at Subway.

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How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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Oh

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Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

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Here's a joke for u Hahaha suck on it I wasnt going to make u laugh o yea ur mom died

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haha ur single hahahahahhahahahhahaahahhaahaha i am 2

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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I once looked at a hedge that had the same colour leaves as all of the other hedges in that particular area.

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

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A married man takes the ring off his finger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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