A Mormon walks into a bar.

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Would anyone like to contribute to my slush fund?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your ass

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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Why did a car full of African-American men pull up to a lonely, caucasian man walking on the sidewalk at 12 p.m. in Harlem? To ask for directions.

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What do you call a person that is green, wearing plaid, and standing next to you in the elevator? What ever their name is

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roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Why did Timmy stay home on the day of the big test at the public school? He was homeschooled

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Who's the biggest badass in the nation? Adrenaline junky Jacobs!

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile

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The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

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Why did the German Constitutional Court issue Decision 2 BvR 1390/12 on September 12, 2012? Because they wanted to refuse the request for a temporary injunction in regards to the European Stability Mechanism!

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roses are red violets are blue i suck at poems i like your boobs

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Why did the man rape the woman? He had a lapse in judgement.

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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-Knock knock. ~Use the doorbell. -Ding dong. ~The witch is dead!

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he is a chicken and is not intelligent enough to know that he is about to be hit by a bus while hopelessly searching for food under an elderly man's nose.

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Why does Bugs Bunny have big ears? Because he's a rabbit

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Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

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MySpace.

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knock knock who's there? hope

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops