How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

What's the difference between a fat man and a little boy? Despite the fact that they were dropped on two different cities, one was made out of uranium, the other was made out of plutonium.

Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

I Have a Black Friend

Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

What starts with an 's' and ends with a 'hit'? Shortly after the war, 4 men went to celebrate at the local bar. They all had a grand time there, when a man in black walked into the bar. The man in black knocks once on the bar. "What do you want?" asked the bartender. The man in black didn't respond. This time, the bartender asked again, only louder. The man in black then turned to his right to face the 4 other men celebrating. The man in black then suddenly pulled out a pistol, and shot the 4th man. He then burst into a sprint and ran out of the bar. "He's hit," the 3rd man shouted, "he's hit!"

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

Q: Why couldn't the man get laid? A: Women were afraid of his 7 testes and 4 penises.

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

Where's the best place to buy moon bars? Michael Toal

Where was little Sara when the bomb went off? Everywhere. "Knock Knock" "Who's there?" Sara's hands

How did the retarded, blind child win the Special Olympics? He didn't, he died of terminal lung cancer the year before. R.I.P.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

Roses are Grey Violets are Grey I am a dog.

knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

Snapple Fact #1 -slaves made life easier

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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