A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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A man told his wife to go make him a sandwich. She said no.

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:) Hey AMBY VALENT! Want to join our horsehead show below?? *Laughing track with that fat loud bitch that wont stop laughing making the actors stare at each other like douches* :/ Muuh, I dont really care im just some meh character anyway so yuh...' *Laughing track* ? ???? ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA! :( Hey get outta our show here you China man! *OOOH! Track plays with some fa*ott whistling* ? ???? | Baka! *leaves* *Awww track plays* *Laughing track*

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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Why did Billy die? His mother killed him.

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Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

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The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

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Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

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Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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Q: What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Cancer

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knock knok whos there? Jacob Jacob who? U know, your friend!

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Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

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What's rape when you shout surprise? The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, especially by the threat or use of violence.

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What do you call a black man in space? An astronaut.

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Where did the Smith family spend their weekend together? At the father's funeral.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

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What is a dogs favorite color? Gray due to the fact that they cant see any other color

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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