glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender: why the long face Horse: I'm dying of an incurable cancer...

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In Soviet Russia You drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up

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Rebecca Black and Justin Bieber get married.... Friends and family attend the wedding

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What do Muslims and Jews have in common? Shared humanity.

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What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

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long in the tooth!

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

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Why couldnt the woman wear her new necklace? She was decapitated

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Why did the man start a shooting spree at walmart? Because he is mentally unstable and people at walmart make easy targets.

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osama bin ladin is dead. let's get a beer.

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Knock knock *I need to either stop masturbating or answer the door* He's probably masturbating. *Who's there?* The other guy left. The end.

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What's the difference between a pizza and a jew. One's a tasty delicious snack and the other one's a pizza.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Cats meow Dogs have four legs

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Roses are red my underwear is brown I just sharted my pants

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What's the difference between Rob Schnieder and Jelly Beans? Someone besides Adam Sandler likes Jelly Beans.

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A ninja is walking down the street then he...finds a puppy a names him rex

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong is an astronaut. Michael Jackson abuses little kids.

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops