getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

Matt is a Duster!

Why did Gary's cat fall from the tree? He didn't use enough gaffa tape.

3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

What did the little boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

whats green and smells like red paint? green paint

Steven Hawking walks into a bar

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

why was the little boy sad? he found out that George Washington was dead.

What do you call a larger individual having intense sex with a smaller individual? Rape.

What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

Q. why did the plane crash? A. because the pilot was a loaf of bread

Why do black guys have white palms? Because that area of the human hand contains no melanocytes, the cells that allow pigment to form.

I don't mind gays unless they shove it down people's throats.

I have an erection My mom!

how do you make Chuck Norris laugh? tell him an anti-joke.

Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

fi uoy nac daer siht sdrawkcab uoy tsuj daer siht sdrawkcab

A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have no idea how to rhyme, I like tacos

Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

Your moms so old. She might die soon

Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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