Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

Roses are red violates are blue, matty is gay, sebby is too

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What is Santa's favorite color? Blue

what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? names.

Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

Whats small and has Aids? Avery..

A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

Knock Knock! EXPLOSION!!!!

I thoroughly dislike arabs, I lost both my parents in the events of 9/11.

Diarrhea

Where's Waldo? The cemetery, he died last week.

There was a brunette, a blonde and a red head, They were all great friends!

what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

Girl look at that body, girl look at that body, I got passion in my pants... Actually I lied, I got a penis and testicles in my pants, but I'm afraid to show it because people might think it's small, sorry

So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he found a crosswalk with a walk symbol near his destination.

I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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