Why did the man with every known fatal disease die? Old age.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was little Johnny sad? His parents were killed in an awful fire

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Look whos talking Matt Critchley

thumb_up thumb_down -3

hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is a homeless man for Halloween? A garbage bag

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the black man buy watermellon? Because he was having a barbecue in his suburban neighborhood and he wanted some fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why does a ginger have no friends? Because it is a non sentient horizontal stem used for seasoning food, and thus incapable of forming complex social and emotional bonds with conscious organisms.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the kid die last night? because his mum stabbed him multiple times in the chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is the best way to eat a dead baby? I don't know. That is incredibly disgusting.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong is an astronaut. Michael Jackson abuses little kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put my dick in your ass

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What comes after 23? 24.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats fat yellow and diabetic Brett lai lan

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was Jerry Sanduski at K-Mart? He heard boys pants were half off!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A duck walks into a bar and says, "Have you got any grapes?" The bartender replies "No." The duck then leaves but returns the next day and again asks, "Have you got any grapes?" And again the bartender answers, "No." This happens again the next day and in annoyance the bartender yells, "If you come in tomorrow and ask if I have any grapes, then I will nail your feet to the floor!" The next day the duck came into the bar and asked, "Have you got any nails?" to which the bartender replied, "Yes." The duck then walked out of the bar

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a black man and a squirrel get hit on two different roads what's the difference? well for starters theyre two different species. a squirrel is much smaller than a human and has his own mark on society. the man will be missed dearly by his family and if the impact with the car wasnt bad, he may have a chance to make it out alive at the hospital. the squirrel however is not so lucky. it will be left to die on the street or would have died on impact already with sadly no squirrel hospital to tend to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Justin Beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops