The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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I've got ninety-nine problems, all of them very diverse and possibly involving women.

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What did the toilet say when I pooped in it Nothing I just crapped in it

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Mahmy

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yo mama is so fat that wii fit puts her in the overweight category

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What did the pencil say to the pen? Nothing.

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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what is long black and smelly the welfare line

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Please give money to a local Jew we have had such a bad time please ONLY people who are Jews.

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Wanna here a joke? Dylan Shipleys penis!!!

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A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

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why was the monster truck late to the rally.. because it had no driver

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You're Mother's so fat, she sat on a chair, and it broke.

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What did death say to life? Go die

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What do Mitt Romney and Barak Obama have in common? Nothing that is why they are running against each other for US President.

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What has stripes, isn't a virgin, and has golden hands? I don't know I asked you first.

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A man asks a young woman at a party if a rag smells like chloroform. She doesn't respond because she's passed out. He takes her to a nearby bedroom, rapes her, and leaves the party promptly. He'll probably victimize many other women with this method.

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doctor , doctor , i feel depressed , we will start you on a course of anti-depressents , vitimins , and daily exercise, make a appointment for next week , and i will referrer you to a phycatrist

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What's red, blue, and purple? purple.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is tearing his family apart.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got run over by a semi and died.

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Anti deep thoughts, by Fabian Monge'. The other day while parked at a stop light i was looking in the rear view mirror at the person who was blowing his horn at me. I then realized that while i was looking back at him the light had been green for a while. I then thought that i had better drive forward because i was holding up traffic, and that it was very selfish of me to waste other peoples time like that while wondering what was going on behind me instead of what was happening in front of me. In the time it took for me to come to this conclusion, i had wasted another few seconds of someones time. How very selfish of me.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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