What's the difference between a cow and a cow? Nothing, they are both the same.

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What did Helen Keller say when she got raped? Stop raping me.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

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Why is Kony so mean? He used to date your mom.

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When life gives you ponies... get a new life!

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You might be a redneck if you're from a rural area and behave as such.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar everyone is amazed because the surgery he just got cured his parilization

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How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

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I dream of a world where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned.

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What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, Roses are red

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What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

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An astronaut walks into a bar. He orders a beer. After waiting for about 1 and a half minutes he receives his beer. The bartender says it was 3 dollars. The astronaut checks his wallet and finds no money so he pays with credit card. The bartender swipes his credit card but the card doesn't work. So the astronaut takes out his debit card. When the bartender swipes the debit card it worked. In relief the astronaut looks at the bartender and says "Thank you" and then goes home.

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Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

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Q: what's the difference between a young, geeky kid living in Wisconsin's basketball and Yao Ming's basketball? A: young, geeky kids cannot live in Wisconsin's basketball. Wisconsin is a state, and states cannot own objects because they aren't sentient beings. And Yao Ming's basketball... is just a regular basketball that happens to be owned by Yao Ming.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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Q: Whats The Difference between Batman and Blackman? A: One can go to a store without Robbing it...

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven died three months ago and was clawing on his bedroom window.

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A man walks into a bar, looks around, and reveals an AK-47 assault rifle he had been concealing beneath his trenchcoat. He then turns to his left and fires repeated shots around the bar, to the surprise and fear of many. Then he shoots himself. The death total is estimated at 9, including the shooter, while the total injured is around 22.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her she is a burnette.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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