If i open this door you can go trough it

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than getting raped then killed? Getting killed then raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how do you tell a politician that you hate him? politicians can be female, too.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Bin laden walks into a bar oh wait he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

why did the kid drop his sandwich? his hand was cut off

thumb_up thumb_down +15

My parents died!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man walks into a bar, the bartender goes why do you have a cane? The man goes "I'm blind."

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Horse with a chair on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

An airplane flies due north at 100 m/s through a 30 m/s cross wind blowing from the east to the west. Determine the resultant velocity of the airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

where was the heart of ocean found. madelain mcanns urn

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hello.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the four friends drive past the bar? To see if it was too crowded to go into or not.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Two penguins are sitting in the bathtub, the first one says to the second one "pass the soap." The other penguin says," what do I look like a radio?"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who's there? Kelly Oh hi Kelly! Long time no see! I know! I've been my working fingers to the bone ever since I got that promotion and I barely have any free time! That must be tough. It is but it pays bills! Being a mother of three isn't a task for the faint of heart. Now Kelly,I was wondering how you thought of the remodeled kitchen....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you call when you see a man murder 8 black guys? The police.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops