A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!! Everybody A-S-S-H-O-L-E!!!!

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

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What do you call a three toed 9 foot man. His name.

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What do you call a black man that works with out pay? A volunteer

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Will there be love in your future? Click the hand with the love-line that is closest to yours

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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why couldn't the boy use the computer He could i meant could

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why is it funny when dogs talk ? Answer: they don't

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I AM SATAN, YOU SHALL LOVE ME BEFORE EVERYBODY ELSE! YOU SHALL STONE THY INSOLENT CHILDREN! THY SHALL R*PE AND KILL IN MY NAME! YOU SHALL HANG MY SON ON THE CROSS WHICH I SACRIFICED BECAUSE HE IS IMMORTAL/BECAUSE I LOVE YOU? "Moral" "Man": Joke is on you, who do you think I am, God?

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Lol Nerochan, that was like totally awesome!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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Q: What happened when the Mexican went to the doctors? A: He was diagnosed with depression.

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My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

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What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

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Once upon a time, there was a cat. He died.

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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Where does Charlie Sheen Shop? Winners

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops