Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

Who won the race across the highway, the Mexican or the Frenchman? Neither, as they were struck by a mac truck when attempting to run across the highway and were both killed instantly on impact.

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Do you like fishsticks No

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

Q: What do dogs and wind have in common? A: They're both blue. Except the dog. Or the wind. Wind is colorless.

you know what's worse than being grounded? AIDS

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

What do you call a monkey holding a hand grenade? It depends on what its name is.

Whats worse than getting a paper-cut? Getting shot. In the head. Three times.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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