What's white and gluey Glue

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What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

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Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

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What's black and can't speak? A garbage can.

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A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

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Why was the dog crying? Do dogs even cry?

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has Stevie

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How are Lamborghinis and piles of dead babies alike? I don't have either in my garage. Except for the pile of dead babies.

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Why did the Middle east send Doris a camel's penis? Because Uncle Monty's head was damn tasty

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I don't have a last name.

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Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

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what do you get when you mix a llama with a ostrich? i dont know

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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Facebook How i met my mother

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worse than finding two worms in your apple? Being raped with a cheese grater.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

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What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

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Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

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this is not a drill.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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tomorrows international kill and orphan day, how meany of the sad bastard's you plan on baking into dough?

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Why is motorboating so much fun? Because they are unmatched for their speed and agility in the water.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops