Christianity

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

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What do you call a scottish drunk? a taxi

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what do u get when you cross a monkey, a sock and wheels? A: a sock monkey. I was kidding about the wheels

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A: Knock Knock B: Come in A: Come in Who B: Your Mum...

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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What's the difference between an X-box and Michael Jackson? One is an inanimate object and the other is a human being.

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your mom was so fat that she died.

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Penis, eggs, mushrooms and tigers

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What did the man say after falling off the bridge? Nothing. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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A. Why did the man crash the car? B. Because the driver was a blind man with no arms, who happened to have a psychological problem affecting his brain's ability to detect movement, thus making the car crash.

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what do a carrot and an elephant have in common? theyre both orange except for the elephant.

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. Q: The one stopped. Why? A: His brother fell off, cracked his head, started uncontrollably bleeding and died.

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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John has 58 candy bars. He eats 40, what does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? There's twenty of them

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? Walking.

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MOOOOOOOOOOO

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was being dragged to his death by an 18 wheeler.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops