What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

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How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

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YOLO

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Why was the man's foot hot? Because it was stuck in a toaster.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex

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The kid was riding a honda xr70r. He got hit by a non moving object and died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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Ben has 3 apples and Charlie has 2 apples, how many carrots can fit in my anus? Banana, because cows have 4 legs

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and leave.

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what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

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What has two legs and two arms? A Human

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Q:Why do black people wear fitted caps? A: So pigeons don't shit on their lips.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

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When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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An Asian walks into a Chinese restaurant. Then he decides that he would prefer Mexican instead, and drives to a Taco Bell.

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops