How many fingers do most people have? 10

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Getting up for a black person on a buss

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A man gets three wishes from a talking banana. His first wish is for a gay lover, his second wish is to have a naked grizzly bear, and his third is to become a professional tennis player. Soon after he got Aids from the Grizzly bear.

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H o m o comes out as homo

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What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

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Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

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April showers bring May flowers! And what do May flowers bring? Bees. Lots and lots of bees.

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The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What did the lawyer say to the Black man? Your case came through, the murderer of your wife has been caught

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Q: Buttsex? A: Butsex!

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Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

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Q: What did the German say to the Jew? A: Guten Tag.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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I hated the Reading festival, i'm dyslexic. I hated it because my family died in a housefire while I was there.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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shitted on em put your numbah 2s in the air if ya did it on em

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What do you call an african american child that hasn't eaten in a week? hungry.

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Abbie has head so far up her arse, it just LOOKS like it's coming out her neck.

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Knock knock Who's there? Taco Taco who? Taco bell

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Why can't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? Because it takes years of hard training to accomplish such a remarkable feat.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a tumor Doctors give it 6 weeks before I die...

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your momma's so stupid she shot herself

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A gorilla walks into a bar and order a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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