What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

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Why did Sally fall off the swingset? she had no arms... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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Chuck Norris.

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A little boy walks up to his father and asks him a question, "Daddy, how are babies born?" His father then replies in an enthusiastic manner, "You see, I stuck my dick in your mom's vag and started pounding. Apparently two condoms defeat the purpose."

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A child is in class. He really has to go to the bathroom. The teacher tells him if he can recite the alphabet, he can go to the bathroom. The kid holds his breath and goes A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z. The teacher tells him good job and allows him to go to the bathroom. When the kid got there there was a man waiting in the stall who brutally raped and murdered the boy. when the teacher noticed the boy was gone for a long time, he went to check on him. When the teacher saw the dead naked body of the boy hanging from the ceiling, he shot himself. The teacher had a family of a wife and 3 sons. The principal of the school had to call the Wife and let her know about the tragedy. The principal also thought this would be a good time to tell the wife that her husband has been having a homosexual affair with him. The wife takes her three sons and drives off a bridge. They all die minus one son (age 14) who had to grow up on the street with other homeless men. He became addicted to crack and when he ran out of places to get money from he decided to rob his old home. He broke into the house and didn't know that a new family has moved in, a married couple and their 1 year old baby. He doesn't want to go to jail, so he kills the baby, spreads the blood all over the parents, ties the dad up and makes him watch his wife get raped, then he shoots the parents before putting the gun on himself. A police officer who responded to the scene had a heart condition and the scene of the crime caused him to have a heart attack. But, he got to the hospital in time and lived.

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What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

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The movie starts off with Tom Cruz jumping out of a plane. He hits the ground and dies, end of movie. - Cole G.

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These two guys walk into a bar. You'd think the second guy would've noticed it was there.

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Whats green and smells like bacon................. Green bacon

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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What do you call a woman that is on her period? -A girl that is expirencing a difficult to control flow of blood through the clitorus.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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roses are red violets are blue clean up that **** or no sex 4 u

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Why does Beyonc'e sing ''to the left to the left''? Because black women have no rights.

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Wh ydo i Hate you? 'COs Your a Gimp!

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What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

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roses are red violets are blue i have to poop

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Beacuse she has no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's There? Not Sally.

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what did the radish say to the orange i'm a radish

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Moby Stick, the Great White Twig

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What do you call a dick with blonde hair? Joffrey Baratheon.

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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Alright then, call me sometime then.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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