This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

Q. What did little John get from reading this. then wait and you will see that the person who you were asking the question will give you a series of awkward faces until they lose interest

i fell like im going to reverse john becase i ate a bikle penis jackson

Why was the white girl crying? Because she was sad.

Q: "What did the blueberry say to the cheesecake?" A: "I'm not your friend anymore!"

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? To provide an alibi for his identical twin who was committing 1st degree murder at the time.

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

Mom: Are you going to jump of a cliff just cause your friends are? Kid: You got married to dad cause you were the last lonely whore left of all your friends. And you wanna talk to me about peer pressure. Mom: Go jump.

Q: How do you make sweet sexy love to cow and make her come several times and then have her lick your stick clean without nobody ever finding out? While secretly keeping her as your girlfriend forever? A: Wouldn't you like to know...

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

2 sausages were in a frying pan. 1 sausage says it sure is hot in here, the other sausage says WTF a talking sausage!

Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

Hey, how much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to drown as a result of climate change.

Sometimes I don't make sense, but when I do, I don't

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Accept for cancer.

roses are red so are the jews every one loved that holocaust news

What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender quickly says to its owner that he must leave as dogs are not allowed in. Upon realizing that it is a seeing eye dog, the bartender retracts his statement and serves the owner a drink.

what did blonde say to the square? ur a square which is comprised of four equal sides and always have four lines of symmetry.

How did the 8 year old child die? He was raped at the age of 7 and given the STD of AIDS. His clock then started as his family cried about his final days of his life.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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