Why don't you play cards with a cheetah? It will attack you.

what did the boy with no arms get for christmas? A pair of robtic arms and now he has super stregth so he fuk up any body who said he would get cancer.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

Oh...okay, good.

What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

What is it too late to do? Apologize...

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

what do you call a black man that sells drugs

What do you do with a dog with no legs? Take it for a drag.

What did the woman do when her husband told her to make him a sandwich? She made him a sandwich promptly.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

It's yellow and when you press the button, it becomes red... A baby chicken in a blender

Why did the blonde throw her alarm clock out the window? Because it was broken.

What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

Cover myself in Vaseline and cry in the dark for 4, maybe 5 hours with or without a wooden splintery dildo in my arse..”

What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

What can move people but not rocks.. Poop

What's worse than getting tripped? Getting shot.

A mercenary was sent from the US to kill a terrorist leader. He was captured by the terrorists but wouldn't give away any information. They beat him, shocked him, cut him, and punched him in a dark room with a light beaming right down on him like a spotlight. It was a grueling five long days until they said "We know you have the information we want, tell us or you will die!" The mercenary sat in silence. They took out a gun and pointed it to his head. The mercenary then broke down and told the terrorists the information they wanted to hear. The terrorists then shot him to death.

What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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