Im batman...suck it losers

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lewis ya baggy fuck

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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Your mom is so fat that she has high cholesterol. Moral: I AM NOT CRAZY! Said the man to the dog.

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Why did the Jew have so much money? He had a good education and therefore, a high paying job.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, Ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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Why do they bury lawyers 10 feet deep? Because deep down they are really good people.

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How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

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What did the girl with no eyes say? I can not see.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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A hermaphrodite walks into a bakery, orders an eclair, then leaves.

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The cast of the 'Jersey Shore' is the worst thing to happen to the Jersey shore

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squash squash who squash my ass

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Q. You guys want to here a joke? Kids: Yeah! A. Women's rights

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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gay pom...

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While teaching her second grade class, Mrs. Peets asks the class a question from last night's homework, "OK class, what did you get for number five, 5+12=?" A kid in the back raises his hand slowly. "Yes James?", said the teacher. The kid in the back says, "My dick is as hard as a rock, Mrs. Peets."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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