Knock Know! Come in!

Keanu Reaves

A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

Trouble with the trolley, eh? No

roses are red carnations are white dont go to bed or ill f**k your friend dwite

dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

Why don't Batman go to an Ozzy Osbourne concert? Because Batman doesn't exist.

Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

Why Didn't LeBron James go to College? He was really good and decided to go to the NBA straight out of High School.

What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

What's the difference between an onion and a baby ? You cry when you cut the onion.

what do you call a dog with no legs? whatever his owner named him it is a shame he can`t run and play with other dogs.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

A blind Man walks into a Bar. A young man quickly runs over to him and helps him up.

What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

What do you call a man without any money? Broke.

Because she has down's syndrome

What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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