What do you call a man without any money? Broke.

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What do you can an astronaut with an apple? Never mind, I have a boner.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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what do you call a dog with no legs? whatever his owner named him it is a shame he can`t run and play with other dogs.

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roses are red carnations are white dont go to bed or ill f**k your friend dwite

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Trouble with the trolley, eh? No

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Knock Know! Come in!

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A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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Keanu Reaves

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Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

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Yo mama is so fat she probably has diabetes, poor circulation in her extremities, and cannot ride anything at Disney World.

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whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.

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Why don't Batman go to an Ozzy Osbourne concert? Because Batman doesn't exist.

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What happens if you play CS:GO? Well you loose alot of fucking money.

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What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

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How many illegal immigrants does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Illegal immigrants don't use lights, they'd get caught. Dumbass.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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who looks like justin bieber and is really cool? george darling but i lied about him being cool.

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What does andy and burger king have in common? Nothing, thats why she is now banging josh!

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i didn't listen to a word you just said but...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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