What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

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Two homeless men are baking in an oven. They scream loudly until they both die.

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Friends are like snowflakes When you pee on them they disappear

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

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Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

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What is a chair?

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hello

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What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

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three blondes are walking along the beach on a desert island, they each have plans to escape. The first swims off the island but is swept in with the current back to land The second blonde burns an SOS into the sand using a rock and twigs-the wind blows it out The third, realising how immature her freinds were, reaches into her pocket and pulls out her mobile phone and begins dialling the coast guard.

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A blonde walks into a bar a uses the restroom. She needed to pee.

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Why did the pied piper eat tea half past three? Because the chicken tripped on the way across the street and the fat lady didn't sing.

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Starting a Genocide #YOLO

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Why did the baby die? Because he got shot in the head repeatedly.

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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What's the difference between Micheal Jackson and a grocery bag? One carries groceries and the other molests children

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What does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? Ow

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Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

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Q)why couldn't the baby talk? A)the baby was dead.

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A man goes to the till of a 7-11 to buy a 12-pack of condoms. "Busy night?" asks the cashier boldly. The man complains to the store's manager about the cashier's misconduct and she is given a formal warning.

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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What happened to the soccer player when he got kicked in the leg..... He cried on the ground for hours even though there is padding there

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Whats the difference between a Cadillac and 100 dead babies? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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Why did the little boy tell his classmates jokes? To try and fit in for once.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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