How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends on its sex. Females weigh 150-250kg, and males weigh upwards of 350kg.

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Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

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Why did the man suddenly burst into flames in room. The room was dark, so he lit a match. It turns out there was hydrogen in the room and when fire touches hydrogen, it sets on fire.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

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Why did Sally fall of the swing? She had Down-Syndrome.

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want to hear a cat joke? i'm just kitten....

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A bird flew into a cave and Batman said, "GET OOOUUUTTT!"

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Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She didn't have a dog.

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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9/11, Amanda Todd, Adalia Rose, Cancer, Swag, Yolo, Disco, anything Southern, Nazi's, and Police officers walk into a bar Everyone stares because these are mildly offensive things.

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You

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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What did Juliet tell Romeo before they kissed? Kiss me Romeo

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knock knock Who's there? The repo man Why? You're being evicted

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pickles.

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A rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

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what happened to the guy that got attacked by a shark he died

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How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

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Hey dude ask me if im a tree!? Are you a tree? No?

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Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

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What does 1 black person on the moon mean? A problem. What do 2 black people on the moon mean? A problem. What does every black person on the world on the moon mean? It's still a problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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