whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

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Shes got a big booty so I call her by her first name, women deserve respect.

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What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

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What did the squirrel say to the other squirrel? Squirrels can't talk.

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles

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What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

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Chuck Norris Dies.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar…. He was shot

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I'm hungry.

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a man walks out of a gas station and sees an indian with his ear to the road. He walks up to him and the indian says "truck... ford truck... large man in front with flannel shirt and trucker cap... german sheperd in passenger seat... licence plate 4563u6." Amazed the other man says " wow, you can tell all of that just by listening to the road?" The indian says "no thats a the truck that ran over me five minuites ago"

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Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

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A black man, hispanic man, and white man walk in to a bar. They are all friends. They enjoy a few beers together then call a taxi to take them home because it is irresponsible to operate a motor vehicle while under the influence of alcohol or other drugs.

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Yo Mama so stupid because she's been addicted to marijuana since she was a teenager, and has lost many brain cells. Resulting in her forgetting simple things like your birthday, her own name, etc. She has also developed lung cancer. She's predicted to die in two months if she continues to smoke as she does now.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had three balls.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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I am a joke. I am funny.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

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What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

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Q: what r u eating under there? A: underwear ewww thats nasty

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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True or false , is it hotter in the summer or in the city? False, because blue monkeys don't eat orangutan bones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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