Someone made a Titanic joke to me today, It was just plane wrong.

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How did the blond know that you like her? You said,"Baby, I like you"

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Why has the suicide in dentists decreased? -Due to the fact that being a dentist makes suicide redundant!

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Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

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What time do you go to the dentist? Depends on the appointment.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Polytetrafluoroethylene is a synthetic fluoropolymer of tetrafluoroethylene that has numerous applications

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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A women's opinion.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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A black man and a white man walk into a bar, "what will it be" said the bartender. Milk, chocolate milk.

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Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I've often heard that a room with a million monkeys with a million typewriters, given enough time; would eventually reproduce the complete works of Shakespeare. This seems to suggest that if something has an extremely low chance of happening, it will still eventually happen if enough attempts are made. However, I feel that the aforementioned scenario, given enough time to play out, would only result in a room full of dead monkeys. Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a green man.

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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YO MAMMA IS SO STUPID, she was recently diagnosed with severe mental retardation and will have to be cared for 24/7

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why did the chicken cross the road? because his mother was dieing of terminal cancer in the hospital across the street where the bar was. he was drinking because he is an alcoholic.

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Why did the farmer name his pig "ink"? He had a terrible case of dementia.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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women's rights

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a jerk that i knew was in a bar. he was about to drive home. at first i tried to stop him until he was sober. instead he punched me in the face. then i dared him to drive home as fast as possible. he died that night... i texted him all the way...

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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