There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr.dre

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A man and Sasquatch are walking down the shoreline on the eastern coast, the man looks back at the foot prints in the sand, he notices that during the hardest parts of his life, there were only one pair of footprints, while in his easiest moments, he sees two pairs of footprints; the man is disturbed about this and he asks Sasquatch this. "Sasquatch, Although you have always promised to be with me in my life, I see that when I needed you most, you were never there. Why is this Sasquatch?" Sasquatch replies, "HREAAHAHG?!"

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Why are black people afraid of white people? They aren't

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

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Why did a black person get gingivitis? He repeatedly didn't brush which caused both dental plaque and tartar getting filled with harmful bacteria, and if they aren't removed from teeth, they will begin to irritate the gums and cause gingivitis.

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What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

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A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, circled, and held up a handwritten sign that said "WHERE AM I?" in large letters. People in the tall building quickly responded to the aircraft, drew a large sign, and held it in a building window. Their sign said "YOU ARE IN A HELICOPTER." The pilot smiled, waved, looked at his map, determined the course to steer to SEATAC airport, and landed safely. After they were on the ground, the copilot asked the pilot how he had done it. "I knew it had to be the Microsoft Building, because they gave me a technically correct but completely useless answer."

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Knock knock? Who's there? A Jehovah's Witness. Oh. Knock knock? Who's there? Not me!

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Why did the CEO step down? Because he was very ill and could no longer meet his duties and expectations as Pear’s CEO.

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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Funny names Alec Balls Isaac Balls Dick Hedd Willy lickerr Lydia Stick Gaylord Sugar Fanny Gouger

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"Oi Tom" "What Tom?" "What did Tom say to Tom?" He was talking to himself Such a bad anti-joke

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why did the photographer take so many pictures? Because he gets paid.

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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What is your view on school violence? I'm all for it.

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What did the Joker say to Batman? Why are we wearing these stupid costumes

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Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he entered the batmobile? Robin, I had sex with your mother this last Thursday.

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Why couldn't the child with down syndrome zip up their jacket.... it was a button jacket ... you asshole

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What did the dog say to the house? Roof

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If you give a mouse a cookie... you're destroying their natural diet.

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A man walks into a bar Ouch He broke his penis So he ate it Then he saw a little boy They shaved their pubic hair together He raped the little boy He walked into another bar Double ouch

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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