Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

CRY

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had just received a call from his family, hearing that his father had just been butchered. He was approaching the farm when an 18-wheeler approached. The tire flew off, hit a candy store, candy flew in the chicken's mouth, and it died of diabetes. However, right before the chicken died he finally crossed the road, not knowing he would get shot by his farmer. The chicken managed to survive the shooting to his right kidney, wiggled to his family, and died in front of his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't little Timmy turn in his homework? Because on the way to school little Timmy was hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If video games were peaceful. Man! You are so strait! That was so good man! GG.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you put in a toaster? Toast, oh wait, it's bread

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What was the old man doing in the parking lot. Looking for a place to park his car

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did humpty dumpty have a great fall? He was committing suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Rick Santorum 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house Knock knock Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is worse than losing your phone? having it destroyed because you were texting while driving causing an accident and you are not eligible for and upgrade for another two months.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the armadillo fall off the cliff?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. What did Michael Jackson say to the banana? A. Nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

When I get aroused I get a solid snake

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses and all the king's men, went and made an omelette.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I was gonna tell a gay joke Butt fuck it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar and a lady asks "Can I help you?" The man replies "No." and walks out of the bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the paraplegic die in a fire? He couldn't get down the stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Who's there? Oh. I was just making sound effects.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr.dre

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops