A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

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you are getting chased by a lion, a tiger, and a zebra. What do you do???? Get off the Merry-go-round.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well he usually takes the bus to his job but he missed it so he had to walk. Unrelated to this, he works at KFC

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How do you make a blond to shoot herself? You give her a gun and than ask her to pull the trigger.

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honest politician

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Whats black and white and red all over Racial violence

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Two farmers are sitting in a cold field. One asks, "Cold day, isn't it?" The other farmer doesn't respond as he has been frozen to death and because of his death, he is unable to respond.

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Your momma's so fat that she should really be concerned for her health and seek professional help to manage her weight.

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I want to name my dog Syndrome. Then, when I teach him to sit, I can say "Down, Syndrome!"

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whats worse than worldwarII world war iii

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I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handlebars...except for the duck

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Knock knock Who's there? The Gestapo, time to go to Auschwitz.

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

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a horse nibbled a baby

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

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What is the pirate's favorite letter? Z.

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust. Nothing the Holocaust was the single worst thing to happen ever.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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