I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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An Icelandic boy hangs himself because of peer pressure. His family mourns for their loss

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Hey! Where is my tracker?

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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Erectile Dysfunction.

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Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

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Why did the cat cross the road? he wanted to be a docter.

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What do you do when a taco eater gives you guacamole? Thank him, and politely smash it in the face of the nearest trashy tourist.

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oooh look a banshee

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how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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What did the Jew say to the German? He said hello.

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Why did Sally fall off the swingset? she had no arms... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he was greeting his new neighbors that moved in across the street. He was very friendly.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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What did the fly say to the frog? Nothing, insects can't talk.

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Why don't carrot tops souls ? They just don't

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What's the difference between a duck and a popsicle? I don't shit on hamsters.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Bat-mobile? - "Robin, get in the Bat-mobile"

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Your mom is so stupid she has to get homeschooled for college!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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