Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

roses are red violets are blue some poems make sense banana monkey glue

thumb_up thumb_down +14

This is an anti-anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Well that explains a lot, thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

thumb_up thumb_down +14

XD I literally cant stop laughing XD, thats like a manly tussle would go down huh? XDXDXD Cartoon Network? Is that thing still on anywhere? You like watching cartoons? I don't mind if you do.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the guy lie down? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why don't you see elephants find in trees? Because most trees can't hold an elephants weight.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend "I know. You need to quit gnawing when you're giving me a blow job."

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws. Because they have razor sharp edges and can slice through flesh very easily, posing a potential threat if possessed by a violent person.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do 69 and 420 have in common? That was my score on my Math final:(

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why didn't grandma ever return Johnathon's calls? Grandma was brutally murdered 2 years prior. Johnathon had issues believing that she was gone. He went on to live a life of pain and suffering, which would eventually lead to suicide at the age of 24.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DON'T POST MESSAGE ON LIKE DIFFERENT VIDEO

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you make a person cry? You bury them alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Knock, knock. Who's there? Me. Me Who? Me. Uh.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops