if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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Barney is a dinosaur We see on medication! And when we are high on drugs He's a hallucination!

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A Minister a Priest and a Rabi walk into a bar, they are not setting a very good example.

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Knock Knock. *silence* Knock Knock.

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2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

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A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

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I can't make my mind about the debate on legalisation of marijuana. Some days I think it's a good thing. Somes days I think it's a bad thing. And some days, I don't think about it at all and I just think it's a very nice day.

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How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's an obscure number you've probably never heard of.

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why did timmy die he was shot in the head by terrorists

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I'm an old man with Alzheimer's. Ok I'm going to tell you a little story. Well i was walking down the road bout 36 sum odd years ago and the next thing i knew i was........... Hmmm.... i wonder whats in the fridge...

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One day in Africa there was a family of Americans touring an African village. They were a happily married couple with a four year old son. This day however was a very sad day because a group of elephants came trampling through the village. The couple left there kids inside and went to help control the elephants. however the elephants killed them all with their feet. Now the little boy wandered outside because after all he was just a little boy. He was about to be killed when a baby elephant calmed down his mom, so he saved his life. The baby elephant then took the little boy back to the airport by which the married couple came because elephants are very smart. The boy didnt want to leave his new found friend the baby elephant but the little boy was then sent back and lived with his Uncle. When he was older, he had a child of his own, a little boy. One day he decided to take his son to a circus, that was from Africa. He didnt realize there would be elephants there. This day the elephants got spooked by a mice and started to stomp all around. Then the man realized his son was missing. He looked down to find his son about to be stomped on by this old elephant. Just as the elephant was about to stomp he and the man made eye contact. The man thought noticed the look in that elephants eyes, like he reconized them. He thought mabye, just mabye it was the same elephant he was saved by. Turns out it wasn't and the elephant killed his son.

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Roses are red violets are blue I think you re stupid go eat a shoe

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1: What is a gum wrapper with no gum? 2: A wrapper? 1: No.

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knock knock who's their panda panda who shut up I never said yo name and don't call me black

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whats 2+2 equal? 4

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Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

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Roses are red Violets are blue What about green? That seems mean...

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

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why did the man hit the flight attendant? Im just kidding he didnt.

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A man and his son cross the street, the man hears a screaming noise and ignores it, the man gets across and notice his wife missing...

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What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

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If a tree falls on a woman and there's no one around to hear her scream why did a tree fall in the kitchen?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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