Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

ok everybody to make this more simple we all have to line up alphabetically by height.

What happened to the man who bought his son a birthday gift? He eventually was robbed and shot in the face

Why cant t-rexes clap their hands? They no longer exist

A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

Why did the black man get lynched? Because he committed eight murders and six double homicides, and the judge wanted him dead...

Rebecca Black.

What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: It didn't do it for any good reason,chickens are mindless and do random things,like crossing the road

What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

YOU

Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

A man walks into a bar, has a drink, pays the bartender, and leaves.

Knock knock I don't play games, go away! Knock knock How did you get in my house? Knock knock Stay back I have a weapon! Knock knock What are you!!! Knock knock Oh god, someone please help! Knock knock What do you want, I can give you money. Knock knock Just don't hurt my family, please. Knock knock!!! WHO'S THERE!!! I am.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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