what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

PENIS THAT IS ALL!

What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

A baby seal walks into a club...

whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

What did the rainbow sun say to the flower-faced elephant? "Want some tea and hamsters?" I'm addicted to acid.

Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had no arms.

What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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