How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Justin Bieber.

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A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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What do you do when you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologize.

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So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

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^that joke's not funny

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"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

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why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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How do you keep a mexican from drowning? Take your foot off the back of his head.

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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What kind of party doesn't have cake? The Nazi Party.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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