What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

Sarah Palin

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

A man buys free health care...

Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

Baman: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? Piderman: What? Baman: They're all gone!

Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

What happens when you put a cat in an oven? Don't, because it will die.

When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

oliver is gay. so much so that he has hex with other men and dosent mind it very much

Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...