what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

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Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

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whats the problem with black and mexican jokes? once youve heard juan youve heard jamal

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Yo Momma's so fat she has Type 1 Diabetes.

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That other group is a *********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************** From Jackson Edwards

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Your momma's so fat when she walks into a restaurant she orders salad.

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Q: Why did Megan Fox cross the road? A: Because she was running from a giant Decepticon!!! Why else!!!???

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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So a man is shopping on black Friday...

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Why did the penis rape the vagina, because it felt good!

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Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

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Why was the wife not in the kitchen? The husband's gay.

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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When life gives you skittles, throw them at random people and say "taste the freaking rainbow!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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