Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

why did jimmy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs!

why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

When the black man was driving his car, why did he stop in front of the gun store? Because his car's velocity reached zero at that location.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

Why did the car get out of bed? Because the person who owned the car was a total freak and put the car into a bed.

Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

PENIS THAT IS ALL!

What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

What's brown and sticky? a stick

Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

There once was a man from Nantucket.

How did the black man get a new television? He worked hard and put away a small percentage of his weekly wage in order to save for this new addition to his household.

A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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